Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behaviors used to
establish power and control over an intimate partner often leading to the
threat or use of violence. Abuse is any controlling, hurtful act, word, or
gesture that injures another’s body or emotions. Domestic violence is not a
disagreement, a marital spat, or an anger management problem. There is no
excuse for domestic violence.
YOU MAY BE
IN AN EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP IF YOUR PARTNER:
- Calls you names, insults you or continually
criticizes you.
- Does not trust you and acts jealous or
possessive.
- Tries to isolate you from family or friends.
- Monitors where you go, who you call, and who
you spend time with.
- Controls finances or refuses to share money.
- Expects you to ask permission.
- Threatens to hurt you, the children, your
family, or your pets.
YOU MAY BE IN A PHYSICALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP IF YOU
PARTNER HAS EVER:
- Damaged property when angry (thrown objects,
punched walls, kicked doors)
- Pushed, slapped, bitten, kicked, or choked you.
- Abandoned you in a dangerous or familiar
place.
- Used a weapon to threaten or hurt you.
- Forced you to leave your home. Kept you from
leaving.
- Prevented you from calling police or seeking
medical attention.
- Hurt your children.
If there is something about your
relationship that scares you, call the National Domestic Violence
Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). Someone is available 24 hours
a day, 365 days a year to listen and provide information to help you get safe.
SAFETY
STRATEGIES
- Think of a safe place to go if an argument
occurs—avoid rooms with no exits (like the bathroom), or rooms with
weapons (such as the kitchen).
- Think about and make a list of safe people to
contact.
- Keep change with you at all times.
- Memorize all important numbers.
- Establish a “code word or sign” so that
family, friends, teachers, or co-workers know when to call for help.
- Think about what you will say to your partner
if he/she becomes violent.
- Remember you have the right to live without
fear and violence.